Saved By The Crappy Vending Machines

I've been really good about what I eat so far, but yesterday I really really really wanted to shovel some junk food in my mouth. I was craving a couple of those chocolate cupcakes with the white swirls on top. Not Hostess cupcakes, because our vending machines just have cheap imitation munchies. Actually, I'm still pissed about the whole Hostess bankruptcy. Management and investors suck all the money out of the company, fuck over the unions, then blame them when the company goes broke. Then after everything settles down, reopen with a bunch of new, lower paid employees, making the same sugar-coma-inducing treats like nothing ever happened.

Probably a bunch of Republicans.

Anyway, I had my mind made up. Chocolate was going to get in my belly.

Then I walked up to the vending machines. There are three snack machines at work. The first one had a sign saying it was out of order.

One down, two to go.

The next one was almost empty. Nothing in it really called my name. No chocolate cupcakes for me so far.

Two down, one to go.

The last machine is sort of over the river and through woods. Around a wall and tucked into a little room I bet some people don't even know is there. So I get there and there's a lady standing in front of it looking confused, then she walks away. I go up to the machine and everything's looking good. There aren't any chocolate cupcakes, but they have imitation Ding-Dongs. Next best thing.

These machines are so new fangled they take credit and debit cards. When I started to put my quarters in I noticed the little spinning indicator on the card reader. Apparently this one ate somebody's card. There was no way to get it to stop trying to authorize the card in question, and it just spit my quarters back out.

No Ding-Dongs for me.

Three down, none to go.

I went back to the second machine but by then I was getting kind of grumpy and it was about time to go back to work anyway. So I guess the vending machines were looking out for me. I would have blown my diet all to hell but instead I just nibbled a handful of almonds & a little dark chocolate.