A Close Call

I think Buddy's getting closer to that big dog house in the sky. Last night when I let him back inside before we went to bed he started circling the livingroom, looking like he was about to drop a load or hurl up something gross and chunky. Then suddenly he just dropped to the floor like a rock. It was like gravity just trippled and he couldn't stand up a second longer. He couldn't even hold his head up, he just lay there, limp. He didn't move or anything for the longest time, just lay there kind of hunched up and panting. Eventually, he lifted his head and moved around a little so he was more comfortable. He usually follows us to the bedroom and sleep at the foot of our bed, but last night he just lay right there where he fell.

I couldn't sleep for some reason. After a while I gave up and went back into the livingroom and laid down on the floor next to him and petted him and talked to him for a while. I was convinced he wasn't going to be breathing when I got up in the morning and wanted to say goodbye to him. I thought about just sleeping there next to him, but he seemed to be comfortable. He might even have been sleeping, I couldn't tell in the dark, so I decided to go back to bed. Later on I heard his claws clitter clattering as he walked into the bedroom. I was glad he was able to get up on his own.

Today The Man and The Girl helped him go outside, but he just stood there for a few minutes looking around and then walked back inside. He's had hotdogs and bratwursts for dinner, and he's drinking, so maybe he's going to make it, at least another week or two. I don't want him to suffer, but I don't want to put him to sleep, so I'm kind of hoping he'll just die quietly in his sleep one day. I'm just glad it didn't have to be today.