When I was little there were only two vegetables - corn or green beans. Once in a blue moon Mom would try to sneak in peas or spinach, but not often. I don't think I ever even saw actual asparagus until I met Keith. Let me tell you, asparagus is yummy, especially the fresh kind, not the mushy processed asparagus in a can.
Anyway, despite it's delicious taste, asparagus has an evil side.
There's some kind of chemical in asparagus that gives you stinky asparagus pee.
I'm talking 'Oh my God, what is that smell?' pee. No matter how many times I eat asparagus I always forget about the stinky asparagus pee. Get up in the morning, minding my own business, & next thing I know there's a horrible stench filling the bathroom. Then I remember.
If you've ever had asparagus and never noticed stinky asparagus pee, you're one of the select few who either 1 - don't metabolize the chemical into stinky asparagus pee, or 2 - you have a defective nose that doesn't recognize the stinky asparagus pee.
Consider yourself lucky.
So anyway, I have a plan.
An evil plan.
The next time we have asparagus I want to give some to my dogs. Or maybe just one of them.
Can you imagine the other dogs when they smell stinky asparagus dog pee? They would worship that dog like a god.
All Hail Stinky McPee.
Or maybe if I was mad at somebody, and they had a cat, I could try and sneak some asparagus to their cat. The litter plan would be a toxic waste dump.
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