We took a chance and planted most of the garden already. We had tons of stuff in 6-packs under florescent lights in the living room that were starting to take over. I already planted the broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, & lettuce, but still had tomatoes, peppers, basil, etc. Surprisingly, the peppers look better than the tomatoes. I should have kept the tomatoes in the 6-packs & fertilized them until they perked up, but I was tired of looking at them so in the garden they went. The peppers can't stand cool weather, so I didn't plant them, but the tomatoes were good to go.
At least that's what I thought. Our neighbors came over today & told us it was too early for the tomatoes. They also said we tilled our garden when it was too wet & now we're going to be stuck with a fucked up, lumpy garden all year. It is a little lumpy, but I've dealt with worse. I think it's going to be okay.
At least that's what I thought. When our neighbors came over today they said the local grocery store had a bunch of onions & potatoes to plant that nobody bought so the store was practically giving them away. They bought a bunch, but didn't have room for all of it so they gave what they couldn't fit in their garden to me. I wasn't going to plant any potatoes & already planted a bunch of onion bulbs, but all I had was white & yellow onions, no red ones. The neighbors gave me more yellow and some red, plus some potatoes.
So anyway, I had to find a place to add the surprise onions & decided to put them in with all the tomatoes I planted yesterday. I was going to plant green bean bushes & maybe some more lettuce or something along the edge of the tomato aisles. I had to promise Keith not to plant any melons or cucumbers or any vine-type plants in the tomatoes. I have to admit last year the garden took on a life of it's own.
So there I was, minding my own business, pushing little bitty red onions in the ground, trying to keep them from getting too close to the path or the tomato plants, when I noticed something was missing. The tomato plants. I planted about 60 tomato plants, but all along one side of the garden they were missing. Sure, they were pretty shitty looking plants when I set them out, but apparently something thought they looked tasty enough. At least tasty enough to nibble off the tops. About 10 plants were either completely gone or just little stubs with the tops laying on the dirt next to them.
Fucking evil rodents from Hell.
Couldn't even actually eat the plants, just fucked them over & then took off.
Bastard.
Keith said we should put up a fence, but fences never seem to work. Unless you're going to bury about a foot of it the little beasties just burrow underneath the fence. Or squeeze through the gate or where two pieces are joined together. We've tried fencing the garden & I don't know how many times I've gone out & surprised a rabbit inside the fence. When they see me they run around like they're hopped up on crack trying to find the way out of the garden.
Then there was the time I was planting something in the garden & saw a pepper plant wiggle around & then just disappear. After a minute or two the next one started wiggling around, too. I don't know if it was a mole or vole or what it was but it had a taste for pepper plants.
The neighbor said the only sure cure for my problem is a lawn chair, a 12-pack of beer, & a shotgun. I'm generally a nonviolent, cycle of life, let nature take it's course kind of girl, but I'm sorely tempted.
Except for the beer part. A couple shots of tequila would probably do the trick.
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