New Mascot

After dinner tonight we were sitting around congratulating The Girl for graduating from high school. Now she doesn't have to put up with the all the bull-shit and politics at school. I told her now she could go to the games and do anything she wanted. Well, except smoke. She could stir up all the shit she wanted. Then I had a brainstorm.

Start a petition to change the school mascot. The Winfield Warriors offends the Native American community. Winfield is small enough that would be like spitting on the flag. It would drive everybody completely nuts. They would think we were crazy or just plain evil. Then I tried to come up with what the new name would be. At first I thought about all the dead deer on the side of the road. Maybe they could be the Winfield Stags, and the women's teams could all be the Does. Then it hit me.

The Winfield Beavers.

After all, Winfield is a river town. There are actually beavers here, not like The Girl's previous school, the Fort Zumwalt Jaguars. I don't think there have ever been jaguars in the St. Charles area. Bobcats, yes, jaguars, no. Aren't they from South America?

And don't you just love thinking about being the announcer at a game? Calling all those jocks a bunch of beavers would just be too sweet. Look at that Beaver go. Plus, I'm sure there are plenty of ways to torture the cheerleaders. Give me a B, give me an E...