This And That

I haven't really done much blogging that was actual blogging and not just posting Sassafras clips, so I'm going to just spew out a bunch of miscellaneous bloggage.

First, we have a bunch of new computers at work. I didn't want to start using them, but one night they made me sit through a training session. I figured watching them show me the new computer was better than actually working, but of course they picked a day when I had been up all night the night before, probably with visions of Sassafras dancing in my head. So anyway, I decided even if they showed me how to use the new computer I was still going to use the old ones until they replaced all of them with the new ones, but the next day when I walked into work my coach grabbed me and strongly encouraged me to use one of the new computers. I couldn't really tell her no without looking like a real jerk, so I humored her and worked on the new computer. By the end of the day I actually liked it. Nobody was as surprised as I was. I generally think change is bad, but these new computers are pretty sweet. After that I've stayed on the new computers as much as I can. One day all the new ones were already taken so I got stuck on an old computer and I couldn't believe how much I forgot about the old system in just a few weeks.

On a totally unrelated subject, I saw what I consider the most gay thing ever on TV last night. I'm sure everybody in the English speaking world has seen the Girls Gone Wild video commercials. Last night was the first time I had ever seen the Guys Gone Wild video commercial. What a hoot. I'm assuming the target audience for the Girls Gone Wild video collection is horny men, but unfortunately I think the target audience for the Guys Gone Wild video is pretty much the same group, except they're horny gay men. I can't imagine any heterosexual woman being interested in these Guys Gone Wild videos, at least not from the clips they showed on the commercial. Maybe the actual tapes are more enticing, but what I saw on the commercial just made me laugh. It was so funny I even rewound it so I could watch the commercial again. I told The Girl I was going to get her the "Dude, Where's My Pants" video for her birthday next month, but for some reason The Man doesn't think that is a good idea.

And now, an update on what I'm affectionately calling Momma's Little Bomb, or my piece of shit car. It is a piece of shit, but that is exactly what I wanted. Something so bad I don't have to worry about locking the doors because nobody would want to steal it. Something small that gets good gas mileage. This is the car I wanted when we ended up buying the Cadillac for The Man. We bought it from my brother, who wasn't interested in auto hygiene. I mean it was dirty. He must have left the windows down a lot, because there was bird poop in the car. Not on the outside, on the inside. This car is pretty primitive compared to what I've been used to. It doesn't have electric windows or locks. It doesn't even have a cigarette lighter. Since I don't smoke that isn't a real hardship for me, but that means I can't charge my cellphone on the way to work, so now I have to remember to check if it needs charging before I go to bed at night.

Unfortunately, it also doesn't have an automatic transmission, so I have to re-learn how to drive a stick shift all over again. It's been probably 15 years since I drove anything with a clutch. I only drove it once so far, and I didn't kill the engine, but there were a few pretty jerky shifts. I haven't driven it much because The Man won't let me drive a new car until it's up to his high standards. So far he's put in a new transmission, a new stereo and four new speakers, two new tires, an axle, a battery and a battery cable. He also worked on the windshield squirter, changed the oil, oh and cleaned the birdshit out. That's love for you.

On a slightly more depressing note, we need a new TV. Not because anything is wrong the either of the TVs we have. We have a pretty big TV in our bedroom, on a little swiveling stand that's mounted on the wall. We have it set up so we can watch TV in bed, or swivel it around and watch it in the kitchen. Two nights ago The Man was turning the TV around so we could watch it in bed and we both heard this loud snap and suddenly the TV started swiveling not only side to side but also up and down. It almost fell off the stand and smacked him in the head, and it's a big enough TV it would have probably knocked him out. I had to help him get it up off the stand and carry it to the living room, where it has been stuck ever since.

The Man thought maybe the mount just needed adjusting or something, but he looked at it today and decided it is just completely fucked. So now we need to get a new mount, and of course it broke because the TV we had hanging off the wall was an older (read heavier) TV, so when he goes out tomorrow to buy a new stand he's just going to pick up a new TV while he's at it. This thrills The Girl, because that means our old TV will be her new TV. Happy birthday, Girl. Just don't expect to be watching a new Guys Gone Wild video on your new TV.