I WOULDN'T SAY I'M DUMB--
BUT I BOUGHT A BOX OF ROCKS
Actually, it was THREE boxes. At a garage sale, where else. Each box is divided into 70 little sections with a rock in each one, nestled inside a scrap of paper that tells what it is. I got all three for $7, and if that isn't a bargain, I don't know what is. The only thing is, I don't know what you do with a box of rocks. I will probably wind up giving them to Ruth and/or Mary. Okay, girls, let's hear it--"ME!" "ME!" "NO, ME!"
How I am going to choose? Should I give them to the Pagan Daughter, who understands their mystical powers? Or to the Science Teacher Daughter, who can show them to the Earth Sciences class she is student-teaching? Or should I divide them up? "Here's a pretty one for you, an ugly one for her . . ."
The possibilities are tremendous. I feel rich. I've got a box of rocks, and everyone wants them.
What? Did you forget about your most beloved grandchild? Have my years of constant care, compassion, and sucking up been overlooked so carelessly? Sure, you could give them to you pagan daughter who would use their power to turn Mickey into a frog or to cast some other equally unholy spell. You could even give them to your "Science Teacher" daughter who would first have to teach her students to read before she could show them rocks with ID cards. Then there is the third option, which went completely unmentioned in your last post: Danny want! Danny want! Danny want!
ReplyDeleteDid you forget about me!? i like shiny things too! don't make me do the puppy dog face! grandpa would give them to me. (i will bribe him with snickers.) forget about Danny, he doesn't deserve the shiny rocks. mommy doesn't either. she would use them for sciency things. NO! you should give two to Shamen Ruthy and one to me!(i only want one.) Us Pagans must stay together! ALL HAIL THE LEAFY LORD!
ReplyDeleteWell, I think you should ask the rocks who they want to live with. You know, rocks have feelings, too. Maybe they want to stay with you. After all, you found them when they were being cruely abandoned in the garage sale. Pick one rock out and put it in your pillow case and see if it sends you any subliminal messages in your dreams. If the only message you get is 'there is a hard rocky lump in my pillow' that means they don't want to stay with you. Of course, it could just mean that rock doesn't want to stay with you. You really need to try that with all 210 rocks.
ReplyDeleteJust make sure the rocks stay in your pillow case. Keith really gets mad when one of my rocks tries to make an escape and sneaks out of my pillow case. For some reason he doesn't enjoy rolling over on top of a rock. I tried telling him the rocks probably don't enjoy it any more than he does, but he didn't seem to care.
well, personally i think that you should first give them to your "Science Teacher" daughter to show to her class (only if she wants to), then give have her give them to my mom. I'm not a begger like the rest of them. =)
ReplyDeletethey are really just rocks and only weird people give them as much value as you people. You all need some serious therepy.That being said, their are 210 rocks, thier are 2 daughters.
ReplyDelete210/2=105. So my reasoning is ask each daughter which rocks they want and then sell them at $2 apeice and make a huge profit. A $413 profit to be exact. Then you could use that money to pay for gas to find more rocks and sell them as well
shut up Jake
ReplyDelete