Choices, Choices

My neighbor is getting married, and I need some help. There are two meals to choose from, and I can't decide which would be less repulsive. Either pork chops with mango chutney, or tilapia with coconut breading. Both sound revolting. I'm leaning toward the pork chops. After all, I could just scrape off the mango chutney if it is as appetizing as it sounds, but it would be harder to pry the coconut breading off the tilapia. Plus, I've actually tasted pork chops, but I have no idea what tilapia tastes like, with or without the coconut breading.

Why do people have to pick such nasty meals for their wedding reception? What's wrong with roast beef or chicken breast? I mean, pork chops would be fine, but what's up with mango chutney? Some sort of fish would be great, but tilapia? With coconut breading? Ew. I like the Hoosier reception my other neighbor had. Hamburgers or hotdogs, potato chips or Cole slaw. All decent American food, not fancy pants haute cuisine.